Planning Your Wedding - Part 3 Choosing your Suppliers

Planning Your Wedding - Part 3

Choosing your Suppliers

Your suppliers can be anything from your florist, photographer, videographer, cake, cars & transport, venue decoration, fireworks, entertainment, bridal wear, groomswear, caterers and of course your venue.

Choosing the right ones can be a minefield when you start looking, here are a few bits of advice that I can offer to help you make the right choices at the right time.

• First, don't be hasty in making your decisions, take your time, it's much better to wait and make the right decision than rushing in, paying your deposits, then finding something you like better later on.  Most deposits are non refundable so mistakes can be costly.
• Shop around, speak to suppliers, go and visit them, see and touch (where you can) what you will be paying for.  
• Recommendations from friends and family who may have used suppliers in the past is normally a good sign, it means that they have received good customer service and have tried and tested their products or services already.
• When you have decided what suppliers you are going to use, make sure you get something in writing and a receipt for any deposits paid and how much is left to be paid and by when.    Read Terms and Conditions carefully before you commit, this can save a load of headaches later! 
• If you are using a wedding coordinator make sure that they have a list of all the suppliers, contact names and phone numbers, this will allow them to coordinate the suppliers on the run up to and including your wedding day.
• A wedding coordinator/planner will also have a range of suppliers that they use and have worked with closely in the past, who they know are reliable, affordable and deliver only the best service to their clients.  It might be worth having a conversation.   Some planners will charge for this Supplier Sourcing at Beauty Weddings we do this free of charge.

Photographers/Videographer

I would advise looking for your photographer as early as possible.   It's all very well a friend saying that they will take your photo's for you, but, there is always a risk that the images won't turn out as you would expect.  Speak to several photographers, find out if they are available on the day of your wedding, look at their websites to see examples of their previous work, go and visit them and see how you get on with them, all these things are so important to make sure that you get the best images of your day.  Photographers and Videographers get booked up quickly which is why it's so important that you do this early.

Florists

Think of the time of year that you want to get married, what kind of flowers are in season?   Do you have a colour scheme in mind?  What style is your dress?  all these things are factors to consider when choosing your bouquet.  Go into florists, see, touch and smell the flowers, ask them to show you examples of their work.  Find out when they would have the bouquets ready, will they deliver them on the day of the wedding and when.  Again shop around and don't rush in.

Wedding Cakes

The choice of cakes out on the market is huge.  There are so many different styles, textures and flavours to choose from.   Decide how much you want to spend on your cake.  Do you have a style in your head.   Many of the wedding shows and fayres will have several stands where you can look at cakes and get an idea of what is on offer, and at the shows there are usually offers available if you book on the day.  

Cars/Transport

It depends on your needs, you might want a vintage car, limo, horse and cart.  Whatever you have your heart set on you need to do this early, as they will be booked up well in advance.  Never just book over the phone!   Go along and have a look at the cars, are they clean and presentable, what is the chauffeur like, are they interested in you and your wedding, when will they arrive, what route will they take, how do they charge - by the hour or 4 hourly?   

Entertainment

Choosing your entertainment can be fun, it depends what you are looking for.  Do you want a band for the evening, or maybe a DJ or a mix of both.   It's a great excuse for a few nights out with your betrothed, to have a look at bands playing in venues, visit websites and listen to their music, and have a chat with them to find out their availability.    

Venue Decoration

You will want your reception venue to have the WOW factor when you and your guests enter the room.  Prices can vary hugely across the industry so shop around look at testimonials, look at photo's and meet with the person that will be decorating your venue for you.  Do they understand what it is you want?  are they able to visualise it with you?   Do they offer advice and ideas?  This is your wedding, you are paying for a service, you can have it any way you want it. 

Caterers

Regardless of whether you are having a wedding in a big hotel or a community centre, your food is something that you want to be right.  If it's your venue that is going to be providing the catering, go there for lunch or dinner before you book anything, bit like a secret shopper if you like, see what the service and food are like before making your decision.   If it's an outside caterer, find out if they are preparing the meals / buffet on site or if they will be bringing it with them, sample some of their menu's, is their attention to detail the way you want it.  All these things are important when making your final decisions.

Finally

Remember to set your budget before you book anything, speak to several suppliers to see what special offers they may have, see, touch, feel and taste as much as possible, and never put a deposit down on anything until you are absolutely certain you have the right person for the job.  If in doubt.... don't!

Next Week.... Planning your Wedding  - Part 4   The Lead up to the Wedding

Planning Your Wedding - Part 2 The Bridal Party

Planning Your Wedding - Part 2

The Bridal Party

Your bridal party are the ones who will be the biggest help and support to you on your wedding day, it is so important that you get this right.    When trying to decide it can bring up all sorts of issues and pressure from the family, and before you know it there can be tension generated.     

First and foremost, This is YOUR wedding!     Couples can get tangled up in the thinking that they have to have their 2nd cousin etc as a bridesmaid, usher etc.    No you don't!  You can have whoever you want, and it really shouldn't be up for discussion with anyone else.  

Brides attendants

Your Maid of Honour/Chief Bridesmaid is one of the people that you will rely on most.  So its is vitally important that you choose wisely,  this person will most likely be the one who you will laugh, cry and rant with during your planning process, they will be honest but never condescending when you ask for advice and will listen when you are just talking weddings!     Whoever in your mind fits that description is the person you should choose.   

Your Best Maid really has a joint role with your Maid of Honour doing all of the above and should have similar qualities, this person will also be responsible for the younger attendants on the day up until the end of the ceremony, but they will also be looking after you.  

If you are having more bridesmaids/flower girls have who you want to have, you don't have to have your nieces or cousins, this is your wedding you can have all your best friends if that's what you want.   

Whoever you choose, someone, somewhere is going to feel put out.   You have to be clear right from the outset that whatever decisions you make in the process of planning your wedding, they are Your decisions and they should be respected.   It's all to easy to lose sight of what your wedding is all about while others wound up.  

Grooms Attendants

The Best Man!   This is the grooms choice, it can also be a difficult one.  The Best Man is responsible for ensuring that the Groom gets dressed, and turns up on time and also have the responsibility of looking after the rings until they are safely deposited on your fingers.!  Some grooms will choose their best friend or brother and what if the bride to be doesn't like that person, well that's where compromise comes in.  That person is important to the Groom, it is his wedding too, so why shouldn't he have the person he chooses.

Ushers/Groomsmen

These again are the Grooms choice, he might just want all his best friends to be at his side, or if he has brothers he might want them, he can give them jobs to do on the day so that they feel included and valued in being chosen to stand by his side on what will be one of the most special days in his life.

How to get the best out of your Bridal Party

Now you have selected everyone, what does that mean for you and for them.  For you its the people who are going to be with you every step of the way, until you say I Do.   For them its special, and they will want to do what they can to help.   Have everyone involved so that they feel included in the planning process.  Delegating some tasks, giving your party roles on the day itself can make your planning so much easier.  

For example you could ask the most confident of the Groomsmen if they will be MC for the day.  That would be ushering guests into the ceremony venue before the bride arrives, announcing the speeches, just being the voice of the day.  Make sure you give plenty of notice that this will be his job, not 2 days before the wedding!

You could assign the role of the younger members to hand out Orders of Service as guests arrive, or at the wedding breakfast instead of having favours on the tables, have the youngsters pass them out personally.  They will be wearing their lovely outfits, why not let them show it off.

You could ask if they would like to do a reading at your wedding ceremony? this can add that extra special touch to their role.  

This is your Wedding Day, the day that you make your promises to each other and share the love that you have for each other with your friends and family, making it a day to remember. 

Next Week - Part 3   Choosing your suppliers

Planning Your Wedding - Part 1

Planning Your Wedding - Part 1

Setting the Date & Finding your Venue

This part of your planning can be the most time intensive and probably one of the most stressful in planning your whole wedding.  There are various things that you have to take into consideration before doing anything.  Breaking your planning down into workable parts is the most effective way of making sure that your plans are as organised as possible.

Okay here are things that you need to consider.

• What type of ceremony do you want?  Religious, Civil, Humanist, Pagan (indoors/outdoors?)
• What time of year do you want to get married? What season?
• Approximately how many guests do you want to come to the wedding - this is a ball park figure at this stage, I will explain later why this is important.
• What type of venue do you want?  A hotel, country house, marquee, pub, back garden etc
• Very important What is your budget for the wedding?   you must be realistic as costs can spiral out of control very quickly.

Now lets look at things a little more in depth.

Religious Ceremony

Having a religious ceremony is the first choice for many couples who want to have a traditional wedding or whose beliefs require it.  This means that you have to take into account other factors.

• Is there a wedding venue (of your choosing) reasonably close to where the service will be?
• Can it accommodate all your guests?
• Will you have to provide transport for your guests to get there? (coach - do they have availability on that day?)
• Are both venues available on the same date?

You may need to go back and forth between the venues and transport providers to make sure that they all have the same date that they can accommodate you with.

Civil Ceremony

There are 4900 licensed wedding venues in the UK which can be found here   This option means that you can  get married and have your reception all in the one location, and for a lot of couples this is the ideal option, as it  cuts down on  costs (unless your are getting married in the Registry Office of course).

Humanist Ceremony

Marriage by a Humanist Celebrant is becoming more and more popular by couples.  What is  Humanist Wedding?  A Humanist Wedding isn’t religious, but it is saying important things about you  and what you believe, your values and your ethics. It’s about publicly making serious vows and promises which mean something to you, and which are legally recognised and legally binding. All this doesn’t mean that the Ceremony has to be dull and boring – far from it. It should be full of joy and laughter, and have the music and readings, which mean something special to you as a couple. You’re free to ask friends and family to take part, not just as bridesmaids and best man, but to take an active part in the ceremony by reading or speaking if you’d like them to.  Your wedding can be almost anywhere (as long as it’s safe and dignified) and can be on any day and at any time you wish. Source   

At this point in time Humanist Ceremonies are only legal in Scotland (except Civil Partnerships) and must be supplemented by a Register Office wedding in England and Wales.

Pagan Weddings (Hand fasting)

This is a traditional wedding that goes back to ancient times and was traditionally called hand fasting.  This is due to the tradition that the wedding ceremony would start by "bonding" a man and a woman who wanted to get married by tying their hands together with a red cord and after one year they would then be recognised as husband and wife.   These days this isn't a requirement and the Pagan wedding can be a lovely ceremony.  As with Humanist ceremonies, this isn't legally binding and must be supplemented by a Register Office wedding.

When to get married.

Think about this carefully.  The "peak" wedding season is normally May to September and December of each year.  Expect to pay more for your venue during these times.  It can really help your budget to get married outwith these months.  Even consider the day of the week to get married.  You will ultimately pay more for a Saturday wedding.  Many venues will do deals during the quieter months and you will get much more for your money just by having your wedding a month either side of the "peak" season or even midweek.  Unless you have your heart set on somewhere, shop around, you will be surprised what deals can be done.  Other money saving tips are :  you might be offered a "package" from the venue, can this be broken down into elements that you can do yourself cheaper.   For example; table centrepieces - can you provide your own?   How much do they charge for linen? Can they incorporate your own colours? Will they charge extra?  Its likely you can do those elements yourself for less. (in most circumstances) 

How many guests

At this point its not necessary to have exact numbers, a guestimate will do.  This will allow you to find out if your desired venue is able to accommodate the amount of guests you want to celebrate your special day with you.  If it can't,  you may have to rethink your options and consider other venues.  It will give you an indication of the total cost of hiring your venue, your wedding breakfast, drinks package and evening buffet.  Many hotels will give you the honeymoon suite (if there is one)free of charge or a room to change/store wedding gift.  They will often give special rates to any guests who might be staying at the hotel/venue on the night of the wedding.  Bear in mind the greater the number of guests the greater the cost.

Type of Venue

This is purely a personal choice, you might have your heart set on a country house, a city centre hotel, local community centre or even a marquee in the grounds of the local pub.  

Remember, you will have to leave deposits which are usually non refundable so choose carefully.  Take time, do your sums and make sure your can afford it, this will save a lot of headaches later.  Make sure you give yourself enough TIME, whether you want your wedding in 3 months or 3 years time, you need to make sure that you are able to pay for it  by the time the wedding comes around. Remember suppliers won't wait for payment until after the wedding they will want it settled in full either a few weeks before or on the day.  Avoid disappointment by budgeting carefully.

Next Week - Planning your Wedding Part 2 -  The Bridal Party!  

Not to be missed - Planning your Wedding - step by step!!!

Congratulations, you have had the romantic proposal (hopefully! ) you have a gorgeous ring on your finger, all your friends and family are so excited for you and you feel on top of the world.   So what's next?

Beautiful diamond ring available from
Pebbles Jewellery Ltd

It's time to start putting the wheels in motion to plan your wedding, one of the biggest days in your life, when you are making promises to each other and starting out on your new life together as husband and wife.   But where do you start!   There are tons of websites out there that will give you ideas and tips, but that can seem so overwhelming.    Over the coming weeks I will be covering the main tasks for your wedding planning step by step.  Of course it does help to have a wedding planner/coordinator, but remember if you are set on doing it all yourself, most planners will give you the initial consultation free of charge,  at least you can bounce some of your ideas off them or even gain a few of your own for your forthcoming plans.  Even if you don't take up their services at the end of the day, the meeting can be a very useful exercise.   But also remember they can be a really valuable source for suppliers,  that not only go the extra mile, but are reliable too.

Over the next few weeks, I will be covering everything from the process of how to set the date  - you may think that's the easy bit... it's not and can be the most time consuming part of all your planning, finding the right venue for you, catering, flowers, dresses, cars etc.  and how to bring them all together so that your day goes off without a hitch.

Make sure you don't miss the first instalment this Friday 16th March 2012

It's my Wedding Day....what could go wrong?

I don't think I have met a bride yet (including myself on my own wedding day) when I was paranoid that something was going to go wrong.   Of all the days this is one where you want it to be perfect.    But such is life, mishaps DO happen, its how you deal with them that's important.

So what could go wrong on your special day?

1. You are up bright and early, feeling excited as well as a little nervous, this is perfectly natural, but what you need to do is EAT and DRINK (not alcohol!!)   Have a proper breakfast as this will set up you up for the long day ahead, what will happen if you don't...you are likely to Faint or feel Dizzy especially when saying your vows.

2. Your flowers arrive and they aren't what you ordered, first don't panic, get onto the florist right away and Delegate someone or let your wedding coordinator go along and get the correct flowers from the florist, don't wait for them to be redelivered.  When you order your flowers take a photo of them so you can have a record of what it is you wanted them to look like and in the case of a slip up, the florist can make amends right way.

3.  To avoid any unsightly stains on your dress from spray tans etc, get your tan done 2 - 3 days before the wedding, this will allow any excesses to be showered off properly before the big day, but should you get a bit of staining on your dress as you are putting it on or before you leave use stain removal wipes or unscented gentle baby wipes and DAB don't wipe.    Something that happened to me at my own wedding, red wine got spilt down the front of my dress, don't panic just get yourself immediately to the ladies room and run the offending stain under cold water, then dab it dry.  

4.  Some guests don't turn up or others who didn't RSVP turn up, venues are accustomed to that, if you have a wedding coordinator they will just fix the problem, rearrange the table settings to accommodate, you won't even know anything about it.  If you don't have a coordinator make sure that your MOH is aware of your table plans and she will be able to sort out the problem for you.  It's not a big a deal as you might think it is, this kind of thing happens all the time.

5.  The car breaks down on its way to pick you up or on the way to your wedding, panic starts to set in, don't  worry it's a little glitch, the car company should be able to replace the car, if not the worst case scenario, call a taxi!  just make sure that someone calls ahead to the venue to let them know that you are running a little late and the reason why. 

6.  A brides worst nightmare tripping as she goes up the aisle!  Don't get upset, make light of it and make a joke of it, it will break the ice and your guests will forget it happened.

7.  The caters have got your menu selection wrong.  Okay this might seem the end of the world, but is it really?  It will be too late to do anything else about it at this point, so you may just have to go with what they have, as long as the dietary requirements of your guests are met.   Get your wedding coordinator or MOH to speak to the caterers discretely and calmly, let them know that its wrong and that compensation or reduction in the bill is required.   This is something that can be dealt with at a later date.

8.  The band doesn't turn up!   Most venues will have an "emergency" back up most likely in the form of a DJ, but its better than nothing,  you are unlikely to find a replacement band who can turn up at very short notice but a DJ can.   Go with the flow and worry about it later.

9.   Someone stands on your dress and rips it!!!   That can be an awful moment for any bride.  Make sure that you have your emergency wedding day kit with you (your wedding coordinator will have one) and have someone put in some emergency stitches, along with a few strategically placed safety pins.  It will get you through the rest of the day, without worry.

10.  To help avoid all of the above,  the week before the wedding contact ALL your suppliers to make sure that what you have ordered is correct and what time things will be delivered and write it all down and who you spoke to and when.   If you have a wedding coordinator they will make sure all this is done for you and will liaise with the suppliers on your behalf to make sure that it all goes to plan.

The most important thing to remember is you are getting married and what that stands for, all the other logistics are just a part of the celebrations.  You are still going to be married after your wedding day and starting your new life together, that's what is really important.